A few years back the Costa Rican government passed legislation that required all cigarette manufacturers to apply graphic warning labels to their products in an alleged attempt to curtail tobacco use among the tropical nation’s inhabitants.From Marlboro Mentolados to Derby Extra Suaves, not a single delicious cigarette was exempt. Gone were the days of cool looking characters that made smoking look fun, as smokers were forced to stand idly by while the Joe Camels and the Marlboro men of the world were quickly replaced by rotten teeth, aborted fetuses and blind blues artist.

Now a word from our Sponsor:

Although we are well aware that cigarettes will kill you (and everyone around you), we can’t help but feel that tobacco companies were unfairly targeted by the law. And since other things will kill you too, The Costa Rica Post has compiled a series of images that show what would happen if other companies were held to the same moral standards that the tobacco companies in this country are held to.

Without further ado, here’s your stupid list:

#9. Pineapples May Make You Bug Resistant

#8 Save on Gas By Shaving Years Off Your Life

Take the guess work out of how you’re going to die. Buy a Motorcycle today!

#7. Skin Cancer Will Kill The Crap Out of You

Forget about crocodiles, Skin Cancer is way more likely to kill you

#6. Coke Makes Kids Uglier Than Normal

Fun Fact: Most beverages marketed towards children are just as bad

#5. Beer and Bad Decisions Go Hand in Hand

It will also make you fat

#4. God is Dead

Next time your kid reaches for a juicebox show them this video

#3. Guaro Multiplies The Amount Stupid In You

Side Effects may include fist fights, traffic infractions, unwanted pregnancies and death

#2 Voting Makes You Complicit 

“….same as the old boss”

#1. Choosing the Best All-Inclusive is a No-Brainer